All the Right Reasons
by CidGregor
Summary: Oneshot, StarOC.  Robin has worn on Starfire's last nerve.  Can anyone make her believe that can still be with him? Or is she destined to find happiness elsewhere?  Dedicated to Lord Belgarion, for your birthday.


Author's Notes: I'm not entirely sure why I'm posting this here, but I didn't want it to go to waste, and there's at least ONE person on this site who will enjoy it, so I suppose that's enough.

This fic was written for the birthday of a friend and fellow author, Lord Belgarion. He's one of the few writers that is well-worth reading on FFN, and one of the even-fewer writers whose primary work, "Titan's Song," which can be found on his FFN page, contains an OC that is actually very good. I did this fic featuring his OC, within the universe of his fanfiction, as sheer indulgence in honor of his birthday. If you're not familiar with "Titan's Song," you're welcome to read up and perhaps find some interest in this fic by proxy. If not, feel free to ignore it completely. Either way I don't expect much response to this oneshot, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

* * *

**All The Right Reasons**

_By CidGregor_

_Rated K+ _

* * *

I've been to the edge…and God knows if I've looked down…or leapt down. 

It was wyrd to think that way. I was never the kind of guy to come up with some kind of elaborate metaphor for my feelings or whatnot. But sometimes…it just seems right.

One such time came upon me today. Where I stood on the edge of a cliff, and faced the choice of staying safe on my sure footing…or taking a wild leap and hoping for the best.

But I digress. I'm starting my story at the ending.

It was a normal day at Titan's Tower. It really was. Perfectly normal. Nothing to suggest anything out of the ordinary had happened, or was happening, or would happen. But I knew from personal experience that 'normal' really knew how to crash and burn sometimes. Problem is, you can never reckon exactly when, where, or how.

Today, 'normal' began crumbling in the late evening. We'd had a bit of a rough battle with Johnny Rancid earlier that day. To our embarrassment, he'd gotten away, and ever since Robin hadn't been seen for more than a moment at a time. I had no idea why at first; the guy seemed like a pretty routine thug, probably wouldn't be too hard to catch. I actually kinda liked his style, truth be told. Anyone who can kick ass on a Harley gets at least a grudging respect from me.

Not that I'd ever openly admit that about a bad guy.

Anyway, eventually Cyborg told me that Johnny Rancid was a touchy nerve with Robin ever since their first encounter with him. Something about wounded pride. It was before my time, he'd said. Don't worry about it, he'd said. So like any man who appreciated the right privacy, I was content to leave Robin to get his brooding out of the way and just let it be.

Starfire, though…well…

Don't get me wrong, she's a wonderful girl. Damn closest thing I've ever seen to an angel on Earth since last I saw Amber. Anyone should thank their lucky stars for the pleasure of simply knowing her. I know I did. I treasured every day I spent with her, and I know she did the same. As much as with any of her friends, anyway.

But when it came to Robin, well…she was pretty smitten with him. Everyone knew it. Problem was, Robin was a tough shell to crack. She tried, in her own sweet little way, to gently coax him out of it now and then. And sometimes it worked. But most of the time, he wouldn't bite. It just wasn't his style. Robin didn't DO romance. With most of what Starfire tried to get his attention, often though it managed to attract mine, she ended up falling flat on her face. It actually kind of pissed me off. Robin, I mean, not Starfire. She was so kind to him through all his rejections. I didn't know how she did it. Her feelings were just that strong, I guess. I always figured she would keep on trying until he took notice…but even Starfire's patience didn't last forever. As I learned the hard way that night.

I happened to be lying on the couch in the Tower's living room that evening, my hat over my face, in a more melancholy mood than I was used to being in. I'd been thinking about Amber. Normally that meant I'd wind up smiling to myself at the good times, or depressing myself with the bad. But this time it was different. The kind of different that really freaks a guy out. I would think about memories I had with her, and remember them with about as much clarity as ever…but Amber herself was strangely blurred. I couldn't figure out why; everything else was the same…but the longer it went on, Amber's face became more and more unclear. Like I'd forgotten what she looked like, preposterous as it sounded. I wondered long and hard about what that meant. For two weeks I wondered why…why she was drifting from my mind. But I didn't have an answer for myself.

As fate – or God – would have it, I was given one.

It was about that point when I heard the main door swish open and closed. I didn't bother to sit up and look over the back of the couch to see who it was; the quiet, careful footsteps told me it was most certainly Robin, probably taking a brief break to get some food in him before scurrying back to the hole he called his work room. Shortly after I heard him rustling around the kitchen, though, I heard the doors open again, and the total lack of footsteps made me take a peek this time. Starfire had hovered into the room, gazing at Robin's turned back. Somehow I knew, before anything had been said, that this wasn't going to go well, so I just laid back down and vowed to keep out of it.

"Robin? I was curious if perhaps you would care to join me in an outing to the theater of movies? There is the most wonderful film showing about your earth penguins that possess joyous leg appendages and--"

"No time, Starfire. Rancid's still out there. I won't let him run wild a second longer."

Starfire predictably paused to choose her words carefully. Then, "Of course, catching the Johnny Rancid is of the utmost importance…but there is nothing you can do until he chooses to show himself again. Perhaps you should relax until then."

I winced instantly. Wrong move, Star.

"You'd rather I wait until he strikes again?" Robin said shortly. "Give him the chance to hurt someone else?"

Starfire shook her head quickly. "N-no, of course not! I would never--"

"I have to find out where he's hiding!" he snapped. "Every second counts! I don't have time to go watch kid's movies!"

And without another word he was gone. A scene I'd seen repeated more times than I could count. And next would normally come the part where Starfire sighed longingly, hung her head, and retreated to her room for a while. That part always tore at my heart. It was physically painful to see her sad.

But this was the point where 'normal' ended. The longing sigh I expected turned out to be a strangely frustrated growl; quiet at first, but gradually growing in volume. I realized a second too late that it was because she was walking straight toward me and my couch; by the time I did realize it, my seat was already being uprooted and flung across the room.

"Whoaahhh-oooaaahhh!!" I shouted as I flailed through the air, and just managed to hum a wind tune to catch myself and land less-than-gracefully on my rear in front of the kitchen.

Starfire let out a surprised gasp. "Friend Bard! Oh X'Hal, I am terribly sorry, I was not aware you were present!"

"My fault for eavesdropping," I grunted as I hauled myself up. I gestured to the couch, which now rested upside down against the wall. "Bad day?"

Starfire covered her face, which had gone completely red from sheer embarrassment. "I am sorry you had to see that…forgive me, I only…lost my temper for a moment…"

I was instantly concerned at that. "…I don't reckon I've _ever_ seen _you_ lose your temper before. What's wrong?"

"Nothing that is worth discussing," she tried to assure me, but it was pretty obvious she was trying to hide her frustration, and it didn't take a genius to figure out the source.

"Star, listen…Robin's not the most romantic guy in the world, but…he'll come around eventually. Just be patient."

"I have _been_ patient!" Starfire suddenly burst out. "I have been patient far longer than even I myself anticipated, and still he shows no interest at all!"

"I'm sure he's interested, Star," I said with a pang of…something. Jealousy? "A guy'd have to be a fool to not be interested in you."

Starfire smiled a little at that. "I thank you for your kindness, friend…you are always so willing to listen to me and reassure me…but sometimes I fear you are mistaken…I fear that something is wrong with me…"

"Don't think like that, Star," I insisted. "Don't ever let yourself think you're not special."

"Then…why does Robin still not respond to me…?"

"Like I said…Robin's not a romantic kind of guy." There was that pang again. "It takes a while to get close to a guy like him…"

"Friend…I wish I could believe that…but I have been waiting and trying for so long now…I fear that 'getting close' to Robin is not possible. I fear that I have wasted my time and affections on someone who…simply will not return them."

I tensed a little. Starfire never talked like this. It seemed impossible that she was really saying what I thought she was saying. She was always willing to wait for Robin, no matter how long it took…at least, everyone had thought so. But no one could wait forever…and even Starfire, apparently, had her limits.

"Listen, Starfire…I'm not the best source of advice, but…you can't give up on love. If you think he's the one that makes you happy, then…" I trailed off and lowered my gaze, and that damned pang kept nagging at me. Why was I hating myself for saying this? She was Robin's girl. That's just how it was. I never thought anything but. I couldn't be jealous. I couldn't.

"Bard…Johnny…"

I looked up at her again. She'd moved closer to me. "Yeah?"

"…This concern…it is not something that has just now come to me. It has been plaguing me for some time."

Yet again, she surprised me. "It has?"

"Surely you must understand this, Johnny…how long has it been for you? Since you lost your Amber?"

I couldn't help but twitch involuntarily, and feel a surge of anger. "Amber has nothing to do with--"

"I do not mean to upset you, friend," she interrupted me. "But truly…it has been many months since she was lost to you…and likewise, Robin…as much as I care for him…has always been lost to me. I have nothing left to offer that he has not turned away. And I wonder…is it worth pursuing still?"

"What…do you mean?"

"I mean…what sense is there in pursuing the unattainable…when I believe I can quite easily find my happiness…elsewhere?"

I knew it already. The way she looked at me when she said that, I just…knew it. Or part of me did. The rest of me…I refused to believe it. Refused to hope. Refused to consider that that forbidden dream in the back of my mind might suddenly be right in front of me. And for a brief moment, I really hated Robin right then…hated him for doing this to Starfire, for leading this temptation to me.

"Johnny…?" she said, touching my shoulder.

"Y-yeah?" I managed.

"Do you not feel…sometimes…it is time for you as well…to move on?"

My gut reaction was no. Of course not. I wouldn't forget Amber, not in a million years.

Except I already was forgetting her, wasn't I? I had thought about her…and she was slowly fading from memory. It was harder than ever to remember those years. But Starfire…she was clear as crystal.

I realized she was moving closer…impossibly close. Her eyes seemed huge at this distance, shining with some powerful emotion…hope?

"Johnny…"

The heat between us was…incredible. Overwhelming. I wanted so much to give in to what she was offering me…and at the same time terrified of what would happen if I did.

So there I was. Standing on the edge of my cliff, facing the toughest choice of my life. And I could either stay on solid ground…turn away, bottle it in, and let life go on as it always had…

…Or I could take a chance. I could leap off the edge…and pray to God I could fly.

And as her other hand touched my cheek, and my own found its way around her waist, I realized…I'd already made my choice.

Her lips pursed.

I leaned forward.

And I leapt.

* * *

**THE END  
**

* * *


End file.
